Dear Mom To Be

I was in your shoes this time last year. Pacing the floor, counting the hours, looking at my baby app countdown and seeing what size fruit or veggie my little girl was that week. I remember all the feels, all the fear, all the excitement. There are TONS of things I wish I knew about being pregnant before I was pregnant. So, here I am, shedding some light on the top 10 things I fretted over most in the nine months-ish of being one with my girl.

1.There are literally HUNDREDS of “baby checklist”s online and most of them claim they are “everything you need”. The truth is… You don’t need most of the things on those lists. You wont USE the majority. Sure, is a wipe warmer nice to have? I guess. But take a deep breath and stick to the basics. Anything extra and luxurious is just that. EXTRA and LUXURIOUS. However, lucky for you, I saved the list I created after compiling a dozen lists into one so if you feel like you are drowning, download this bad boy and go to town with your registry.

2. Don’t buy the fancy creams and oils. Water and good genetics are your best defense against stretch marks. Embrace the journey my friend. Trust me… The new marks are only as bad as you make them to be in your head. If you start to notice some and they make you feel blue, go read this blog and turn on Katy Perry “Roar” and fist punch the air for a few minutes. That’ll get ya through.

3. On that note, GUZZLE water. Repeat after me, “for these nine months, I am a fish”. Not only will your baby thank you for the extra sips but your body will too (after you pee for the millionth time today). Like I said, water and good genes are your best defense against stretch marks. ALSO, you are growing a human. Newsflash- humans are made up of more than 60% water. Give your soon to be little cherub a head start.

4. Pinterest is a TOOL (and not the bad kind like your ex boyfriend). That’s it. It’s not the end all be all of existence so please do not login and pin a million designer nurseries with the expectations of YOUR nursery looking like THEIR nursery. Unless of course you are a designer, know a designer or wish to become a designer (in that case, more power to ya, sister). Of course you want the nursery to be lovely because that’s part of the nesting phase but it’s not as important as who is going in the nursery. Thus, perfection is not required, it’s being attained in your womb. Speaking of, your child is used to crammed quarters and liquid floating around him/her so I’m pretty sure the color of the walls in their room won’t matter until they are MUCH older.

5. MAKE. A. BIRTH. PLAN. (here is what mine looked like) Sit down with a doula, a medical professional, a midwife, a woman that has been there before (I don’t care who) and write out your preferences. And then in the words of my physician “tear it up”. Not literally, unless that’s liberating to you (like burning bras or tossing panties.. idk.. women’s rights and such). Really, take a good look at that plan, visualize it, and prepare yourself for labor to go one of two ways: exactly as you planned or the farthest thing from what you planned. Either way you get a baby in the end so you win. Don’t hold so closely to your birth plan that it ruins your birth experience.

6. Have a gender reveal party. I’m not one to make a big fuss about things. In fact, if you polled the majority of people and asked them to describe me in 5 words or less they would more than likely all say “laid back”. BUT, I did decide to have a gender reveal party. The way I see it is this: You only get that moment once with that child. If ever you have a reason to make a “fuss”, it would be now. Once again, it doesn’t have to be over the top (refer to #4).

7. What’s in a name? A LOT but don’t let that weigh you down. I remember CRYING because I couldn’t pick a name good enough for my daughter, Lennon. Everything sounded too mediocre for such an incredible miracle so the hospital staff had to force my hand in choosing one. Do as I say not as I did. Choose a name BEFORE you go into labor.

8. Embrace. Your. Bump. I was so self conscious about taking selfies (and being in pictures in general) that I didn’t relish my pregnancy enough. Now every time I see a pregnant woman I want to scream “CAPTURE EVERY MOMENT!!” Wear fitted clothes, rub that Buddha belly, schedule a maternity photo session unashamedly and FLAUNT. YOUR. STUFF. SISTER!

9. Oh, for the love of all things good, LET PEOPLE LOVE YOUR BUMP. I get you don’t want creepy, old farts rubbing on your belly so you have my permission to tell them to kick rocks but for everyone else, just let them do it. You have a huge bump protruding from your abdomen it’s impossible for an outsider to no want to touch it! I mean, I kind of get men’s fascination with breasts. They are TWO bumps protruding from a woman’s body so.. samesies. Nope. Never mind.. I still don’t get it. But, if it’s a woman, the truth is she probably either wants a baby of her own or misses the miracle of pregnancy. If it’s a male (a VERY close friend or family member) they don’t ever get to experience this awesome gift. The least you could do is let them feel a kick or two.

10. Last and most important: cherish everything. Every kick. Every flutter. Every heartbeat. Every ultrasound. Embrace every stinkin’ sappy, maternal emotion you have. You will never get to have that kind of experience with that child again. Sure, you will have new emotions post-partum but for a brief moment, you are one and two at the same time. It’s magical, spiritual and life changing.

What things do you wish you knew about pregnancy before you were pregnant?